Comic Storyboard Vid-cap

I really liked this episode from a competition perspective. I thought the competition was the most interesting and fun so far, and the exile was nail biting. On the personal interaction and drama level, I felt nothing that interesting happened for the challengers, although we got a glimpse of what Male Depression is with Danny sitting in the bathtub.

Seeing as how I just got out of Iron Man 2(decent flick) I decided to do a comic-book style recap of the competition, b/c I thought it was so hilarious. I'm going to highlight two particular events, the Landon/Carley attemp, and the Jillian/Pete attempt. Creative license employed!

Spider-Man vs the Nagging Housewife
Starring: Jillian & Pete
Background: The year is 2010, the setting is British Columbia. Our protoganists find themselves pushed to the limit, and backs to the edge. Their objective? Launch themselves in unison across a bottomless ravine of icy of death(or 30 ft or so above the water...same thing). Can they succeed despite signs of internal strife and pre-coital bickering? Do they have the strength to emerge winners of the competition?


Pete looks around himself, and gathers his internal strength with a deep and resounding breath. Concentrate, he tells himself. The whole world is watching me and depending on me. With a running start his leaps his way across the gaps and flies effortlessly through the air towards the target. Sonic Boom! he yells and he flies horizontally at least 1.5 ft, which probably sets some records, somewhere, somehow.


As the menacing punching bag zooms straight into Pete's vision, his primal instincts take over, and he ceases to be Pete the 21 year old baby, and transforms into Pete the 21 year old man-beast, with a heavy emPHASIS on the BEAST part. Letting out a deep growl that would shake the very trees if they had ears, Pete extends all of of his limbs into a vise-like grip on the bag. YEE-HAWWW!!! I got this shit down! Who's yo Daddy? Drop it likes its hawt! She's got the apple bottom jeans, boots with the fur! Blame it on the al-al-al-cohol!


Meanwhile...our heroine Jillian is not impressed with Pete's rapping club-thuggery, and politely informs him that he must turn around. After all, Jillian is quite delicate and quite dainty and abhors the thought of touching Pete's backside. Flustered, Pete replies that he can not turn around. Man-Beast is only good for charging forward, not turning around. Grunt Grunt! Turning is for the little people. Grunt Grunt!


As time passes, and the strength from Pete's massive limbs begin to slowly sap away, the verbal confrontation becomes testier. Just jump on my back, I'm strong, you can do it, says Pete. Turn around turn around! counters Jill. I can't turn around, cries Pete. Turn around turn around! says Jill. Note: This exchange goes on for a while with no discernable change in conversation content. This writer finds it quite fascinating that two ppl can have an argument where the same thing is said over and over again.


Fast forward another minute or so into the future, and we find our hero, Pete, desperately clingly on to the punching bag with his fingers, every ounce of strength in his body slowly slipping away, as if it were a fleeting wisp of air itself in the pale night. It looks very dire now, and everyone is anticipating a painful fall. Please Jill, I can't hold it much longer! cries Pete, the sound of pain pervasive throughout the timbre of his voice. I'm sorry Pete, its suicide, I can't jump, its too far. If one of us has to fall to their death, I'm glad it was you. I'll speak well of you when you are gone, I promise you that, exclaims Jill. Nooo, don't leave me to my fate!! Jiiiilllllll!!!!! cries Pete

The Rag Doll and the Pregnant Manatee
Starring: Carley
Background: The year is 2010, the setting is British Columbia. Our unlikely heroine is the vegas strip club waitress Carley. What does it mean to be a strip club waitress? Does it mean that this is someone who is about to become a stripper, but just needs some mentoring? Is this someone who is not good enough to be a stripper? Deep deep questions indeed, and the spotlight shines on Carley to prove her internal fortitude in this precipitous challenge competition.


With her partner Landon as the ultimate gentlemen and letting the lady go first, Carley explodes and leaps into action. (nice butt shot by the way MTV) Like an elegant eagle, Carley soars!


As she reaches the bag, a brief moment of elation spreads through out her soul and it appears that she might just make it.


However, that feeling is short lived, and it turns out her years of ninja training and tai-bo watching have not paid off. Her fingers, tired from strumming her golden blonde hair all day long, do not have the strength of maintain a tight clasp on the punching bag. Carley, plummets and falls, with her arms still locked like a mangled claw-like hook.

The next few scenes are not for the weak of heart, as we watch our heroine fall and flop like a rag doll. Let's observe the rotation of her rag doll body in silence.












Carley emerges from the water, making sad painful noises like a manatee giving birth. Ahhhh nahhh nahhh nahhh! Look at the shockwaves spreading from the point of impact. Tremendous.