Mark Long 4ever

I have a lot of questions about Mark Long. Is he married? Divorced? Does he have spawn? What do we actually know about his personal life? What is his normal job? How old is he really? Well that one is easy, he was born in 1971.

Were you shocked when it was revealed that he'd never been in an elimination? That's really astounding. Surprisingly, this is only Mark's sixth Challenge, and he's probably hosted more After Shows than anything. And he's only won two. So how does he support himself? I don't get it.

Mark's other Road Rules companions: Allison Jones, Kit Hoover, Los Jackson, and Shelly Spottedhorse. I don't remember any of these people, except for Kit. What type of steroids and workout regime is Mark on that he looks like he does? It's insanity. Wait, does he use Insanity Work Out? In theory Mark is probably the ultimate way too old bachelor and party guy you see in Pacific Beach bars, but he's very likeable and definitely not a douchebag by any means. I guess what I'm saying is that when I'm 40 I'd like to be Mark Long.

Other notes: Why did CT and Diem get knee pads when everyone else didn't? Such a huge advantage. CT is a beast! Did you see him pulling the parachute all by himself? I hope he carries Diem across the finish line and then they get for real married. No wait, I want him to hook up with Laurel, so he shouldn't marry Diem.

Let's talk about Robin's "my son, my son" excuses. Using your child in an attempt to stay out of the Dome? How low can you go? I realized, as the cast members talked about how they've seen Robin go from this bubbly cheery person to whatever she is now, that I have also witnessed her (d)evolution. Similar things happen to our non-MTV friends, and it's just, sad. At least here we can talk about it out loud and make fun of them. When my friends with kids try to guilt trip me into doing something, I just have to say "sorry, busy." I can't send them into any elimination challenges.

On the flip side, we've seen CT turn from a crazed beast into a mature and fun guy -- witness his leap onto Johnny during the After Show. The Real World / Road Rules is really America's equivalent of the Up Series, wouldn't you agree?

Why is Johnny so much shorter than Mark and CT? I guess maybe Johnny is like 5'10 and the other two are over 6 feet? I think after this season, I'm ready for another crew of Fresh Meat, this top heavy veteran season is making me feel the need for new blood and drama.